Category Archives: Counseling/Therapy

What is your argument REALLY about?

Why do we keep having stupid arguments? Death by a thousand cuts – that’s what those recurring, seemingly insignificant arguments might be doing to your relationship. Clients so often tell me, “We argue about the stupidest things!” Well, maybe. Or, maybe what you are actually arguing about is something else, something important, but you are […]

Do You Want Things To Be This Way A Year From Now?

“If nothing changes, nothing changes.” I don’t know who first said that, but it challenges one of the biggest obstacles to a better life:  waiting.  Some people call it “hope” — hoping things will get better — without a plan.  Other people call it fear — holding on to what you have because change sounds […]

Communication Problems Series, Part 2: Defensiveness

A Sneaky Problem Defensiveness is a big stumbling block to great communication because it’s so sneaky.  You can’t really see it very well unless you’re on the receiving end of it.  When we accidentally hurt someone, it seems so logical to explain how innocent we are.  “I didn’t mean it!”  or “I didn’t mean it […]